If you keep trying new tips and still end your week feeling drained, you are not alone. Short fixes can feel good in the moment, then the same loops return. This post gives you a simple map that explains why, and it shows you how to create the kind of change that lasts. It pairs with our free guide, The Hidden Reason Life Feels Overwhelming. Grab the guide now, then keep reading to see how to use it. (it’ll be sent to your inbox)
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The Three Columns
Take a moment to look at page 4 of the guide. You should read the other pages as well, but to follow along in this post, you can jump to page 4. Read through those 3 columns and consider what else you would add to those columns for yourself.
If you’re like most people, you probably bounce around between Column 1 and Column 2, with the goal of getting to Column 3.
- Column 1: What you want to change, such as stress and overwhelm, low energy, poor sleep, conflict, procrastination.
- Column 2: What you have tried, including routines, apps, workouts, journaling, therapy sessions, time off. Helpful for a while, then the effect fades.
- Column 3: What you want instead such as steady focus, real rest, natural motivation, better relationships, a calmer pace with progress.
We try column 2 items over and over again. But the effects just don’t last. Often our behavior temporarily changes, but we don’t experience true relief from our 1st column struggles.
That’s because your brain is still holding onto those Column 1 things. For some reason, your brain believes it actually NEEDS those things in order to get yourself to everything in the Column 3. So of course it won’t let those beneficial behaviors make a difference and stick.
The reason Column 2 fades is simple: the inside did not change yet. When your internal system shifts first, the same external tools begin to work the way you hoped.
So how do we do that? How do we change the belief systems that keep us stuck in Column 1?
The Three Powers:
Our entire nervous system can be simplified down to 3 functions: take in sensory information, process that information, and take action. Everything your brain does falls into those categories.
From that, we extracted the 3 basic things our brain is designed to do, called the 3 Powers:
- Focus: where and how we direct mental and physical attention and processing power
- Meaning: the perspectives and interpretations that we focus on
- Action: the behaviors we take based on our focus and meaning
When these align on the inside, your brain unlocks better access to clarity, energy, and follow through. External tactics, workouts, planners, apps, begin to reinforce the shift instead of fighting old loops. And the reason it works is because your 3 Powers are what your brain is designed to do. Everything stems from these 3 functions. It’s efficient and effective.
Confined State versus Free State, the lived difference
On Page 6 the guide shows these two operating modes side by side. Here is a short snapshot:
Confined State:
Attention sticks to threats and limits, meaning turns into pressure and self blame, actions narrow, progress stalls. Everything feels like a threat. We get stuck in a victimhood mindset and we let go of our innate 3 Powers and consequently any control over our experience. As we get stuck in fight or flight mode, our brain processes everything as a threat and focuses on what could go wrong.
Free State:
Attention finds resources and options, meaning opens possibilities, actions become easier, progress becomes steadier. We see challenges as opportunities. We expand our 3 Powers and maintain control of our entire experience. This is where we feel peace and joy. Our brain regains access to higher levels of processing, creativity and problem solving, making life feel effortless and clear.
Why short term relief fades
Actions and behavior are not who we are. They are the manifestation of who we are, or in other words, the neuropathways within our brain. So if we want to truly change, we can’t start with our behavior. We have to start with our belief systems, the way we think and the way our brain interprets the world.
Then once we’ve changed those neuropathways we reinforce them with new actions and new behaviors.
Get our free PDF Guide: The Hidden Reason Life Feels Overwhelming
How to use this map today
Read the guide, keep Page 4, Page 5, and Page 6 handy this week, and notice one place where you can align Focus, Meaning, and Action. Small, consistent shifts build a Free State faster than big pushes that fade.
If you want to jump right to the good stuff and start mastering your life you can access our specialized course here:
The 3 Powers: Master Your Mind and Life
Key takeaway
Inside first, outside second, then repeat until steady.
